I find myself writing about love although I haven't experienced it in human form to its fullest extent. I also find myself writing about scriptures and my understanding of the word of God regarding his plans for our lives and love. When I talk about love, my eyes sparkle. They don't sparkle because of human like memories I've experienced, but because I have read deeply in scriptures, have observed my surroundings, and human behavior purposely to formulate deep understanding on the topic many believe to know of, but lack knowing. See, when I find myself discussing love, I discuss the love that never dwindles.

I believe in a love that isn't fairytale like, but Godly like. See, when I write about love, I write about it with conviction and understanding of God’s love for humanity. His love for humanity and the creation itself is unconditional. I believe in a love that transforms all things together, from people, environments, situations, and what the human mind can't comprehend. Love is a powerful topic, and often connected to the simple connection most find or at least attempt to form , create, and attain under their own decision making. 

This past summer, I asked a young lady, age 18, about what her perception of love was. She responded "You create it. You choose someone and you end in a relationship, and if it works out people get married. If it doesn't people get a divorce. Simple". Her response was simple, and took about five minutes of response time.  Then, I took out the time to compare notes taken in 2019 after deep reflections after I asked the same question to my grandmother before she passed away. My grandmother was near her 80s, and responded in her language , "Love is found when you least expect it. Love may find you when you're ready for it or not. God aligns two souls at the perfect timing or not and the two souls cannot let go of each other because they are meant to be together. Love is knowing that you cannot experience it unless you choose to and it often requires sacrifices and having to experience shifts and changes before its beauty. Love is strong and powerful. When it comes it comes and it changes everything around you. It makes you realize you were just existing and not living". My grandmothers words and response time took a long time. Her response is being summarized, although she spoke for about 2 hours about this "Love" that made her reflect , cry, and smile. It was in that moment, that my eyes brightened up, and widened as she spoke. It's as if she was speaking of something so true, that it transported my visual and thoughtful self to her past and experiences. It was in that moment, that I realized how deep love can be. She also spoke about finding love in life through God, her children, and so on.

During Summer 2024, I also asked a few couples in local parks, about their secret ingredient to a long lasting love. As I walk my dog, I'm often mesmerized by elderly couples in their 70s or 80s. One couple asked to pet my dog, and that's when I asked "What's your secret ingredient to a long lasting love?". The husband of the elderly wife responded, "We found each other quite late. She just came into my life and switched everything around my 50s. If I could go back and start life with her from early 20s I would, but in my 50s I looked forward to what life could be and couldn't imagine myself without her. Our ingredient is to trust- trust your heart.". That response reminded me of the precious words found in a wise elderly woman, my grandmother.

As I walked away, I reflected, and found myself at another park a few days later. I found an elderly couple sitting down by a bench with their dog. I smiled , and they smiled. Thankfully I always walk with my dog, and dog owners may relate to this. If you have a dog , and someone else does too, you will find yourself stopping for a quick greeting as the dogs sniff each other. I almost didn't ask, but felt intrigued to learn more from elderlies, and understand them more. It felt natural to ask the same question once again. This couple responded differently and smiled at each other at the same time. The husband responded "We don't have an ingredient. We choose to believe in the love we didn't find until we met. We choose to fix the problems together and make something brighter out of the problems. We choose to stick together when it gets difficult". The wife added "When we choose to love one another , I'm always my happiest and he's his happiest even when there are difficulties. That's how I know we choose because love chose us". This couple was more open to discuss their long love story of over forty years. They also asked me questions, which was nice. It felt as a social experiment, but the more I learned and continue to learn, the more I realize how uniquely every couple thinks.

I decided to try asking the same question to a third elderly couple days later. The couple I asked was a couple that sat very far apart from each other next to an ice cream shop in a local park with small tables and chairs for residents. I sat with some ice cream, my dog, and of course the elderly woman said "nice dog, is she friendly?". I felt intrigued and asked the same question.. This couple had a different body language, gestures, and verbal responses that allowed me to connect with the unhappy folks. As I asked the question, "What is your secret to a long lasting love?", the wife responded "We're stuck with each other because we had no choice". The husband responded with a curse word to his wife and continued to text on his phone while enjoying his ice cream. The wife said "Our ingredient to a long lasting love was our business and children. They were our glue" as she smiled. The elderly man didn't respond much more, was sitting apart from her, and seemed angry. I thanked them for their response and walked away without demonstrating how sad their response was. Their response allowed me to connect with others that may experience long or life long lasting relationships with emptiness, trouble, and heartache. I choose to share these three examples of elderly couples , my grandmothers response, and a young adults perspective as I asked them questions with the intentions of hearing thoughts about love from others.

There's been many other questions I've asked elderly couples as I'm drawn to hear from them when I find the opportunity. I'm a believer that we can learn from others. From the couples that I asked, I learned a lot whether they knew it or not. I've learned that every relationship and marriage can be defined in its own way depending on the couples experiences and alignment. It's clear when two are aligned by Gods plans to be together versus two aligned by their self will. Gods plans for us are plans of good. In Jeremiah 29:11, you can read the following verse stating "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and hope". One or the other can occur when building relationships . Two can join with understanding of Gods divine plan for them. Or two can join because they decide to and choose to without thinking about God’s will or without acknowledging God’s will. The two who join aligning to God’s will and purpose will experience a rich and life long love with the gift of joy it brings. Those who join by self will and misalignment spiritually, will suffer, fade, and break apart because it won’t be able to function.

My analysis regarding love, passion, and understanding are linked to three components. Psychology, God’s will (my faith), and observations/interviewing.  Out of those three, I prioritize Gods will and scriptures because in scriptures I've discovered truths. I've discovered life through scriptures, and the life that science, nor the top scientists of the world can describe. Growing up I was a lover of science, until I realized that science and those who believe in science are often perceived as "low-warmth" , "cold", or "lifeless". Top leaders whom are also spiritual from multiple fields and pastoral leaders recognize the power of science being taught in school, but the limited description of the truths found in scriptures. I choose to experience the “agape love”, found in scriptures.

Growing up and in my early college years, I told myself I would study Psychology and further my studies in Psychology. Until one day, in 2019, I found myself reading scriptures that contradicted science. Or scriptures that allowed me to find answers about certain diagnoses people may live with. I recall preparing myself for a presentation about a diagnosed young man with a diagnostic that didn't have healing, except for treatment. My presentation was provided to my class and professor who was kind enough to ask me a question at the end of class. She asked "Have you ever wondered if there are answers and cure to what your future patients can struggle with that isn't found in science?". I didn't have an exact answer for her, but smiled as I walked away thinking "A scientist that questions if science truly responds to what we are taught to believe".  I don't downgrade the power and beauty of science, but I'm also not blinded to other realities that can never be explained by scientists after my deep scriptures reading sessions and study of the early psychological books and studies. I will write more regarding psychology, but my ultimate point is that my faith, and scriptures have allowed me to discover the truths about love and life. 

Is my faith and trust in God a reason to ignore science or logic? No. But I've found faith, scriptures, and his word to answer questions and provide life, guidance, and wisdom unfound anywhere else. I recognize my religion known as Christianity as a simple yet powerful friendship with God ; Jesus Christ. I have also studied and sought deep understanding in every other religion, to understand and connect with others as I approach them while providing my utmost respect. I've learned that we're all one big family although everyone has their own mindset, interpretation about faith, religion, etc. Everyone is valuable, and special despite the differences we hold. 

I include love and scriptures because the love I read about is immense, powerful, and unlike what some may experience. I've experienced a love so deep by simply reading the Holy Bible , that I have a new vision and mindset of what love is compared to what I initially thought it was growing up.  Through scriptures I discovered "agape love". In John 3:16 it says that "God is love". In Luke , Matthew , Corinthians, and other books in the bible, you can find verses about his "love". Agape love is sacrificial, pure, and unconditional. Agape love can be practiced in relationships to create a deeper mental, emotional and spiritual connection between two that become one. Prior to marriage, couples can begin to practice agape love by loving one another for their mindsets, thoughts, emotions, secrets, fears, weaknesses and strengths. Couples that learn to practice agape love can encounter a life long term love life through a practice that will create strengthened union mentally, emotionally, and spiritually rather than just physically.  When two join without divine alignment, the love will dwindle , it will feel lifeless, and fade away because it wasn’t the love chosen based on understanding of what love truly is.

Some join one another while believing they have found their true love. As time passes, that "love" fades and feels "off" because it was likely physical. When choosing to describe the term love, we must be very careful. Love isn't a temporarily emotion or a feeling to express around with someone because they make you smile. Love is a powerful word that connects with the agape love described in scriptures. A love that has no limits, a love that can truly last a lifetime. Love takes time , but when it arrives, I pray you understand what God feels for you.  In Romans 5:8, it says " But God demonstrates his own love for us in this : While we were still sinners, Christ died for us". He loved you since before you were conceived. The moment you were conceived , his plans and purpose for you were also being formed. You're not a walking robot, you're a walking human being who has a heart, mind, body, and soul. You're a divine creature made by the most wonderful author and creator. You're meant to be loved, cherished, and fulfilled for a lifetime. 

When Christ gave himself away, he gave himself away due to love. He sacrificed himself at the cross knowing he could've gotten down. But he loved you and me, despite your sins , he loved you. We are born sinners, and he knew that. He saw your existence since before you were born and said "I Love You". When I connect scriptures with love, I recall that his plans for us are plans of good. In Isaiah 34:16, it says "Not one of these shall be missing; none shall be without her mate. For the mouth of the Lord has commanded, and his Spirit has gathered them".  He has divine plans and alignments for each life. The spiritual walk and journey allows us to learn how to allow his divine plans to come true. Love can be rich, life lasting, and the most powerful gift from God. May you encounter a love so deep and rich designed for you according to his divine plan and alignment.  I pray you experience the same “agape love” I found that I cannot contain. I choose to love people, and build them up through the love I found. May you experience it, live it, and if you haven’t; it will find you. You cannot run away from God’s love or your designed love partner as he created one for you.